I Want a Wife or Girlfriend or Somebody

Lately, I’ve found myself been inside the mind of a new character, or maybe it’s Sled again. In an effort to learn more about him, I’m writing whatever comes out, poetry or prose. This came out today.

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I Want a Wife or Girlfriend or Somebody

I’ll buy one of those cheap ones online
One of those cheap shower curtains
Double-lined to look expensive to the uneducated

It’s a must that the inner liner be clear
It’s a deal-breaker if it’s not clear

I want a wife or girlfriend or somebody transparent
One who doesn’t care what my outer liner looks like
Or if it has a lovely flowery pattern

We’re not into matchy-matchy around here
What do you think?
Couldn’t agree more she’d say

I want a wife or girlfriend or somebody who pulls the clear liner
Hands that leave the flowery one where it belongs
A corner recipient of mildew and mold

I want a body who showers behind clear plastic
Some body who leaves the bathroom door open
Even when guests wander

One who calls when a body passes
Hey whoever come in chat and keep company
Since you’re here hand me this and that

So how’s life? (lather)
That’s nice (rinse )
Me too (repeat)

I want someone who lets her hair grow
And one who doesn’t
One who changes it no matter what others think

Or maybe I’d prefer one who never showers
Only bathes in steam and creeping mist through open doors
Lazy legs slosh in soupy hot water suds

So tell me (shave stroke)
How’ve you been? (razor rinse)
Really? Me too (shave stroke)

No, I want a wife or girlfriend or somebody who showers
Prefers not to baste like a bobbing vegetable in soapy water
One who stands bold and blind with probing arms

One who feels humid air for a towel and says hurry
Hurry the drippy girl says unaware of exactly who is present
Eyes lost in tight squints, soap burn victim, hurry

Hurry (but don’t hurry) I say
I want one who doesn’t mind a lingering burn
One okay with people taking sweet time hurrying

I want a wife or girlfriend or some body
One who has no need to close the shade before bed
Like I wish neighbors and strangers didn’t

I want one who shades nothing from this world
One who says take your sweetest time even if uncomfortable
But hand me a towel soon and hurry

One who says please
To whatever body who darkens the door
Hurry eventually

I want one who doesn’t have or need everything
Matchy-matchy in her life
One squinty and stinging wet and in want but not lacking

One who does the frustrated impatient shower dance
A jumpy wet body or girlfriend or wife fully observed
One who accepts smattered applause

I want one who demands gradually but when she does
Hand me a towel now
Now as in now now

Large, small
New or frayed, flowery or not
Any color or size will do

Order a cheap one online
I don’t care what you do
Just hurry

I want a wife or girlfriend or somebody
One who accepts my appreciation of pretty objects
Even when our plastic flowers are overtaken by mold

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